JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize
