How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
