Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
