Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
