if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
