his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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