Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize