We're facebook friends in real life
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize