we have pet lesbian snakes
Welp...herpes.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
