I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
