Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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