WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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