we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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