My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
