And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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