Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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