bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
