I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
