Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
