PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
