How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize
