they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize