Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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