Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
