Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
