How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize