If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
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