i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
