Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
