I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
