do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize