I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Randomize