Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
