Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
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