Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Randomize