This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
