Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Randomize