why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Randomize