Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
