am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
