We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
