She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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