then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
