Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
