Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize