all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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