Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
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