I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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