Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
