who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
