what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
